mis-judging

i might as well get hit by train at this rate...

sometimes i feel like i've misjudged my parents..
cos they are pretty okay (at certain times)..

but somehow i keep feeling like a misfit...
and when they do stuff that is sooo not what i'm wanting..
that's when it pisses me off..(they had been doing that alot quite lately)
and then out of the blue, this week, they had gotten me alot of things during their weekly grocery shopping rounds *they've been leaving MY stuff out of the list for the month...

so, this kinda threw me off abit..
and it got me thinking, maybe i'm the one misunderstanding them alot..
*sigh*
but this battle will never end for sure...atleast until the day i can fully be open with them..
which is goodness knows when...

also, i have my stupid demons that keep appearing during the times when i have my PMS..
they suck BIG time! cos, all wud end up thinking in my head is all the stuff i that i have been meaning/wanting to tell my parents for all the hurt and pain i still (*unfortunately) carry in my heart..

sadly, it's in my nature not to forget the hurt and pain that i receive...
i may forgive, but i can never ever forget..especially the hurt..
i wish i cud change that, but i cant...atleast not yet..
cos some of those are the ones that have shaped me into the person i am today...

adioz
~shakti~